How to calm anxiety can be one of the top Google searches nowadays. Because no human has ever been unaffected by it.
Anxieties can be approached and explained differently, yet one thing we all agree on: they make us uncomfortable and interfere with our normal lives.
I prepared 13 authentic and really hands-on ways to calm your anxiety immediately and bring you the desired relief.
Let’s get to it.
UNDERSTANDING THE SCALE OF THE PROBLEM
Definition
Anxiety is a physical sensation accompanied by compulsive repeating thought patterns that reinforce it. It is a sustained and excessive thread of worry that takes you on a ride loop by loop.
That’s right – it is a PHYSICAL SENSATION, which means it starts in the body, not in the mind, as we used to think.
It is born in the body first, and then our mind steps in and begins weaving a story around it. A story that tries to explain why we feel this way, what might happen next, and how we should protect ourselves. And because the mind hates uncertainty, it fills in the blanks with worst-case scenarios, assumptions, and “what if” spirals.
The importance
Anxiety has always been of particular interest to me. Maybe because I’ve always suffered from it myself.
What I have learned through the extended research is that anxiety is our nature. It is in our DNA, a default setting, so to speak. However, in the high-paced and demanding day and age we live it only intensifies.
If we don’t do anything, it will only seep deeper into all spheres of our lives and will affect our daily functionality.
Although we can’t get rid of anxiety completely, we can lower its intensity. This is what we will try to do.
1. learn to accept your anxiety
We all don’t like the feeling of being anxious, but what is so scary about it? What can it do to you?
Accepting anxiety sounds illogical, but think about it: Did ever resisting a negative feeling or emotion actually help? It is like trying not to think about something – the harder you try, the more you think about it.
So, might as well give up and accept it.
I once heard funny advice. During panic attacks, many people experience a strong fear of death. The author of the book I was reading suggests in such situations to lie down and really, really, really try to die.
Yeah, right, very funny. Anybody who has ever experienced intense fear of dying during an anxiety attack will agree that it is impossible. But the idea is neat.
My best experiences with panic attacks and anxieties happened when I was able to surrender. Meaning, I wasn’t escaping it, wasn’t distracting myself, and wasn’t panicking. Instead, I just let it be.
When you surrender, you learn that the nature of anxiety is temporary, and like a wave, it comes and goes. And if you don’t do anything, eventually it minimizes to almost nothing, and you will overcome anxiety almost effortlessly.
2. Breathing deeply will calm anxiety
I am not a fan of breathing techniques, although people claim they help. I just think it requires practice and takes personal preferences to commit to it.
Rather, I suggest simple and intentional deep breathing in and out.
It is a little effortless ritual that
- implies that anxiety is noticed, and
- helps to refocus and restart the momentum.
This effective way to calm anxiety requires almost nothing. Do you think you can do it?
If you are open to breathing techniques, I recommend that you go for SOMATIC BREATHWORK. This method helps you connect directly with your body and release the stuck fight-or-flight energy that fuels anxiety.
Here’s a good article with specific somatic breathing exercises.
3. focus on the present moment
I like the idea of THE NOW. It is very potent, and there is real power behind it. I even believe that only there can we find real help to completely get over anxiety.
A couple of times in my life, I had glimpses of what life can feel like when you are totally surrendered in the present moment. It is hard to explain verbally, but it feels like home. And definitely, there is no anxiety there.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t last long as it is not a very natural state for us.
But here is what you can do to tap into it.
Practice
Next time you notice that you are anxious, bring yourself to the moment by:
- observing for a few moments your heartbeat or your breathing,
- bringing attention to your feet and feeling the ground,
- focusing on hearing, catching as many sounds as you can,
- observing your most recent thought.
Do all of it until you can, before you get distracted. No pressure, it is not an obligation. Stop any time.
Tip
You can also create a little move that anchors you to this small practice. For example, when I find myself anxious while driving in the car, I usually place my hand on my knee and concentrate on the contact feeling. It reminds me to stay present.
4. make physical activity your friend
Physical activity is not only a good way to deal with anxiety, but is a NATURAL AND THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO FEEL GOOD.
Adding exercise to your routine will improve the intensity of anxiety. In fact, it should be the number one habit to adopt for anyone who wants to improve their life in one way or the other.
In my opinion, the most effective and proven exercise type that really helps to get rid of anxiety is cardio. It does magic to me personally, and.. IT HAS THE SCIENCE BEHIND IT. I see a huge shift to better in the frequency and intensity of the anxiety attacks when I’m consistent with my cardio routine.
Besides that, physical activity is a natural way to calm anxiety fast in the moment of the actual attack.
As soon as anxiety hits, take a few minutes to get it out of your system. Depending on your location and situation, you can choose to do
- a few sets of Jumping Jacks,
- run up and down the stairs,
- dance like a maniac to your favorite music, or
- sprint around the block like Forest Gump.
5. Smiling can calm your anxiety
The body and the mind are strongly connected, especially when it comes to anxiety or stress. In simple terms, when you are anxious, the body tenses up and when the body tenses up, you get anxious. It creates a loop in which you stay and can’t get out.
In order to break the loop, simply… Smile!
Make the body believe that everything is great.
Smiling for no reason, at first, will feel fake, especially if you are in the midst of fear and worry. However, I noticed that as I started smiling, good-feeling thoughts magically started to come to my mind.
6. Show some self-compassion
Without doubt, we love getting hard on ourselves for almost everything.
If, during an anxiety attack, you experience negative feelings towards yourself, you only make the situation worse.
Removing this additional layer of feelings is a necessary condition to calm anxiety.
I suggest that instead of criticizing yourself and experiencing blame, shame, anger, or embarrassment, you start practicing self-compassion.
Something to think about
You can use your anxiety attack episodes as a good opportunity to practice self-love and self-compassion. What you can do, is every time you notice self-critical thoughts, stop and think of the words you would say to a dear friend in the same situation.
Would you shame your friend for having an anxiety meltdown? I doubt that.
So why don’t you give yourself some love?
7. rationalizing will not help
Usually, anxiety comes with a lot of negative thinking. Most likely, rationalizing these anxiety thoughts will not help. But seeing the bigger picture behind it can.
Try something different. Instead of arguing that your anxiety is not legit and calling the validity of it into question, become a philosopher.
For a few moments:
- Ponder the insignificance of certain “problems” when they are looked at from the universal perspective
- Remind yourself that nothing stays the same in life and everything moves. Events, situations, thoughts, feelings, and emotions – everything will pass
- Think of life’s finiteness and imagine how this little moment of anxiety disappears in time
- Contemplate other people’s lives and the much more serious struggles they are going through.
8. share your anxiety or say it out loud
In the psychoeducational groups I run, I teach trauma survivors “emotional first aid” – simple tools they can use in the moment when something overwhelming happens.
One of the most effective tools is VERBALIZING THE INCIDENT OUT LOUD.
There’s a real scientific reason why this works:
When you put your internal experience into words — even simple ones like “I’m scared,” “My chest is tight,” “I think I’m shutting down right now” — you shift the brain from the amygdala (the alarm system) to the prefrontal cortex (the part that processes language and meaning).
The same applies to anxiety or other overwhelming feelings.
Sharing helps. Venting out your situation to someone else, while focusing mostly on the feelings and emotions, brings relief. Why else do we have friends and voice messengers?
Most of the time, you don’t even need a reply. It is not about finding a solution – it is just about draining this anxiety out of your body and dissolving it in the air.
Try this
If you can’t think of a person to share with, record the message for yourself. Give yourself some airtime by verbalizing the anxiety, and turn the volume all the way up.
Exaggerate and be dramatic, cry if you can, let it all out. You will notice how very soon your mind will become more pleasantly engaged.
9. redirect your energy instead of suppressing it
Anxiety is a highly charged force and the more attention you give to the thoughts around it, the bigger it grows.
What most people don’t realize is that anxiety carries a tremendous amount of raw energy. It’s activation, it’s momentum, it’s your nervous system fully online.
Instead of letting that energy spiral into worry, rumination, or panic, you can redirect it into something constructive.
It is interesting
It is a well-known fact that the most venerable geniuses of all time who left behind a valuable legacy for humanity experienced a lot of mental health issues, including acute anxiety and panic attacks.
Nietzsche, Dostoevsky, Schopenhauer, Beethoven, Tolstoy, Hemingway, Van Gogh – the list is endless.
And who knows, maybe their infinite creative potential can be attributed to the mental struggles they had and how they managed to use them to their own benefit.
And who knows, maybe you are a genius as well?
Jokes aside, the point is that finding a productive outlet for anxiety is imperative.
James Hollis, in his book Swamplands of the Soul: New Life in Dismal Places, puts it beautifully:
“Thus we are forced into a difficult choice: anxiety or depression. If we move forward, as our soul insists, we may be flooded with anxiety. If we do not move forward, we will suffer the depression, the pressing down of the soul’s purpose. In such a difficult choice one must choose anxiety, for anxiety is at least the path of personal growth; depression is a stagnation and defeat of life. “
So if you have small hobbies, or if you know some talents that you have why don’t you shift your attention towards them each time you experience worry or fear? Reframing anxiety into something you get excited about can not only stop anxiety thoughts but also improve your personal achievements. It’s a win-win!
10. have you own mantra
Mantra is a soothing, affirmation-like sentence that you repeat to yourself during critical moments.
It is important to understand that the mantra MUST REFLECT YOUR PERSONAL BELIEFS.
No matter if it is just one word or a phrase, it needs to resonate with you.
Examples of single-word mantras can be:
- Calm
- Peace
- Relax
- Breath
- Now
Feel free to use my personal favorite phrases:
- All is well
- And that shall pass
- Things are always working out for me
- May I feel peaceful
- May I accept life the way it is
- We are all in this together
11. use journaling as a tool to overcome anxiety
I don’t know what should happen for me to start journaling consistently. But I am adding it here because I had experience with it and I know it works.
I recently found a couple of pages from my once-attempted diary. What surprised me was that I couldn’t remember that particular occasion of my anxiety attack.
What happens is that when we are in the midst of a bad tantrum, we get completely absorbed in it and are unable to see reality clearly. But once a painful moment is gone, we successfully erase it from our memory.
Finding and reading what I was going through at a particular moment gave me a different perspective on my anxieties.
Now, when I’m anxious, I know that my reality in this particular moment can be distorted. This knowledge gives me extra strength to cope with anxiety attacks.
If you, like me, don’t like the whole idea of keeping a journal, simply use it for a temporary relief. Express your worry on a piece of paper and destroy it after you are done.
12. get some fresh air
There is something special about the outside.
Undoubtedly, being locked in without a possibility of getting out can drive anyone crazy. The pressure of walls and ceilings, and natural light limitations altogether can easily bring out anxiety.
For many people, the first aid during an anxiety attack will be going outside to get some air. Taking a stroll around the block or walking a dog can sometimes be enough to feel better and calm anxiety.
13. Use a device to target anxiety in the body
As we talked about in the previous paragraphs, anxiety begins and lives in the body. Sometimes, no matter what you do, somatic exercises, regular physical activity, or breathing exercises, your body stays very resistant.
There are devices like Pulsetto or Sensate that you can try. Many of my clients swear that they reduce anxiety in minutes.
The science behind their effectiveness is very straightforward. They work by stimulating the vagus nerve, which activates the body’s parasympathetic system (the “rest and digest” mode).
This helps lower heart rate, slow breathing, and signals the nervous system that it’s safe to calm down.
Used consistently, they can be a practical tool to address anxiety directly at its source – the body – skipping the other strategies we’ve already discussed.
Perfect for those who want things the easy way.
Embrace anxiety into your life
In this last section, I’m going to get a bit philosophical — but stay with me.
In this life, we experience the world through our physical senses. We use our bodies to see, smell, touch, hear, and taste. And we also have feelings, emotions, and thoughts.
When you look at it this way, it’s actually not that much — just a handful of channels through which we experience existence.
But when we reject anxiety, or any sensation we label as “negative,” we narrow our experience even further.
We cut ourselves off from something that is simply part of being human.
Being in a physical body is a rare, extraordinary experience — and it includes a full spectrum of sensations. As much as we’d like, we cannot “unsubscribe” from sadness, worry, fear, grief, or discomfort. They come with the package.
So why not accept them as part of the whole?
Embracing life as it is — and learning to honor your low moments just as much as your high ones — is a philosophy. It’s a stance you choose. And when you choose it, you give yourself a tremendous gift.
Because the moment you stop fighting, resisting, complaining, or trying to control every internal ripple, something shifts.
You begin to feel lighter. Calmer. More grounded.
And gradually, the quality of your life changes — not because everything becomes perfect, but because you stop treating your internal world as the enemy.
